GATHER round children, and hear the tale of Principled Pig.
Principled Pig was a popular pig and was good at telling other pigs what to do.
One day he was elected to Westminster Farm, where pigs discussed piggy problems and porcine policy.
Principled Pig and Mrs Pig were very happy in their new home.
But then Principled Pig noticed something strange was happening at feeding time. W
hile all the pigs were given their own personal trough, the other pigs were all helping themselves to extra from the farmer's trough.
Perplexed, Principled Pig asked the other pigs to explain.
"We all do it," grinned Greedy Pig.
"That's hardly the point," spluttered Principled Pig. "Is it allowed?"
Greedy Pig wrinkled his snout and winked a little piggy eye.
"Does the farmer know?" asked Principled Pig.
"What the farmer doesn't know," replied Greedy Pig, "Won't hurt him. Come and join us."
Principled Pig shook his head and trotted off home to Mrs Pig.
But his troubles were just beginning.
Mrs Pig had heard that other pigs had been helping themselves to the farmer's own stash of straw and wood to build their own luxurious pens.
"Can't we do that?" pouted Mrs Pig, with a flutter of her eyelashes.
"Certainly not," protested Principled Pig, "Our pen is perfectly comfortable. The other pigs are just being greedy."
Whereupon Mrs Pig stamped her trotters and went off to sleep at the other end of the barn.
As the weeks went by Principled Pig grew lonely and wan.
His tail, once proud and curly, now felt droopy and sad.
And when he grunted his opinions in the piggy chamber, the other pigs drowned him out with cries of "oink oink!"
Some of the friendlier pigs took him aside and remarked on how thin he was looking, and warned that he was starting to smell like yesterday's bacon.
Worst of all, Mrs Pig was seen strutting around the farmyard with Greedy Pig, sporting some shiny new varnish on her trotters, and giggling in a vulgar manner when Greedy Pig nibbled her tail.
Principled Pig was sick of being principled.
So the next day he helped himself to as much of the farmer's wood and straw as he could carry, and built a second pig pen.
At feeding time, he joined the other pigs at the farmer's trough and gobbled more than his fair share.
Then, all of a sudden the barn door swung open, revealing the farmer with a furious look on his face.
"You'd better have good excuses for this," he shouted, "or I will banish you from Westminster Farm! But first I will beat you."
One by one, the pigs were beaten.
When it was Principled Pig's turn, he squealed, protesting that he had wanted nothing in life but to talk porcine policy and do good deeds.
But this further enraged the farmer, who continued to rain down the blows on Principled Pig with a rolled-up copy of the Daily Telegraph.
And Principled Pig felt ashamed because he knew that, were anyone to compare him with any of the other pigs, they would no longer be able to tell the difference.
